How to create lasting change
How to create lasting change
By Belinda Llewellyn, Gaia Natural Medicine
I’ve been pondering what I think are some really big questions around personal change.
1. What stops us from following through with change(s)?
2. Why is it so difficult to implement new behaviours when we know they will support us?
So, here’s my take on it.
The thing is, deep, lasting change is never easy. Let’s face it, most of the time it’s disruptive and downright inconsiderate of our precious time, money and maybe even our reputation.
Often it’s easier and ‘less stressful’ to stick with what we know, even if we know this isn’t ideal for us. We end up hanging on and hoping for the best while continuing to attract similar, difficult life situations, relationships and moods, as well as chronic health complaints.
“If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.” Albert Einstein
Sometimes, resistance to change can be so strong that we find ourselves coming up with all sorts of reasons for why we don’t need to change or why the considered change is ‘out of the question right now’.
The most common ones tend to be, “I can’t afford it”, “I don’t have time”, “It’ll be too disruptive to my relationship(s)/family/work”.
These are all logical and very plausible left brain reasons for why you can’t change.
Let’s take a closer look at these common reasons.
I CAN'T AFFORD IT
Money is a big one, but often (not always) when we look at how and where we’re spending our money we realise that if we begin to rearrange some of our spending habits, we would be able to make this investment in ourselves, whether it’s replacing some of our foods/drinks with quality whole food (nutrient dense) alternatives, to engaging help from specific qualified individuals for support, to investing in a ‘practitioner’ prescribed supplement/herbal regime.
I suggest giving yourself a time frame to work with, especially if you’re particularly attached to some of your food/drink/lifestyle habits. But be realistic, as real, lasting change does take time.
i'M TOO BUSY
I can’t emphasise the importance of this one enough.
When we start telling ourselves and everyone else around us that “we’re too busy”, it’s a sure sign that we’ve allowed our stress hormones to take over the running of our body and our life.
This is a state where we are unable to think clearly about ourselves and what our body needs to stay balanced, healthy and calm.
We disconnect from our body’s fundamental need for food, hydration, rest, movement and sleep as “we just don’t have time”, while the idea of letting go of anything causes immense fear and anxiety.
Often, along with all this busyness comes a deep sense that nothing is good enough, so we drive ourselves to do more, be more and, possibly, have more, more, more…
If this is you, maybe it’s time to stop and allow yourself some space to just BE.
The process of stopping generally starts within ourselves (mindfulness) and gradually works its way into our outer world step by step.
IT'LL BE TOO DISRUPTIVE TO MY RELATIONSHIP(S)/FAMILY/WORK
This relates to the ‘people pleaser’ in us, who is always saying yes and unable to say no. Boundary setting is helpful here.
When we love, honour, value and nurture ourselves others will do the same, but it needs to come from us first. We need to make ourselves a priority.
“When we live in a state of stress our outer world becomes more important than our inner world.” Dr Joe Dispenza
Often many of the excuses we make cover up a deeper truth that is based in childhood fears and feelings of not being good enough or worthy enough. These are the subconscious drivers that tend to sabotage our ability to follow through with change. They also inhibit us from finding that deep sense of satisfaction and contentment in our lives.
“Be the change you want to see in the world.” Gandhi
Implementing change isn’t selfish. It’s taking responsibility for who, what and how we are with ourselves, others and the world around us.
When we begin reconnecting with our own innate needs we stop expecting everyone else to change so our life will be better. We have more energy and feel more alive instead of exhausted all the time. And we start valuing all aspects of our life just the way they are. We flourish and so does everyone around us.
So don’t allow anything to get in the way of your own deep personal growth/change. Dig deep and find the courage and commitment (to you) to follow through with things that support your health and happiness.
You’re worth it!
Belinda and her clinic Gaia Natural Medicine in Bayswater are part of the Nourish Melbourne Community. Nourish Melbourne Members can save on all consults with Belinda. Click here to find out more or if you're not a member and would like to know how you can save on all things wellness, click here for details.